ensign

I have not written anything here in quite some time and all I have today is a poem but I think it might be worth reading for some of you maybe. It’s.. well really I would like to hear what you find it to be about.

20110328 update:
It has a title now and I changed the ending which may or may not really be the ending but for now it is.

~~~~~~

Speaking of which
whetting molted silver gelatin and tin
Estate sales without captions
prints adrift.
I have a book in my cupboard it is
a board
for cups or so it..

driftwoods spirit face moving
over water
I jumped. I meant
to go back and jump again

pinned on my back when he leapt
unheard “do
what I say and I won’t
hurt you” only
what he said itself blunt force
bearing down on me
and up

Between “turn
over” and
“you’re free to go”
blank space or not space yet
as blank
eraser ripping paper it was so hard to modulate
the swipe.

whisper it.
Ships topple sails purple
slack waving
Flagstone and remnant coursing according
to tide tables
traced
tenderly

Rescind me.
One hot July night not fighting but
well sighted
Sighed open ceiling white sheetrock
I slipped through
roughshod tottering
a canyon rim yonder lights out
ignites shout under jet
streamed ice waterwheel
turned or
burned
or
fern walled gullies in March I place
my cheek to wet moss

splayed under this body
three times my size
in spasms beyond recall
This gentle assailant stalls
rubbing himself
forgetful.

Myself I could not seize the moment
only counting on time to peter out
slow blinking deriliction no notes
Here the scene ends

and ends
and ends
and never tires of ending

I cut my teeth on critique
could train resolve on careful reasoning
Neither
jester
nor prince and you
read with the cunning of
some species reknown
for sprightly banter be it
blood at the teeth or thick wine
tableside

Me I
sputter and point
words
pelts
Spit sticks like glue
if you choose your materials
with care.

Water
paper
plastic
Thrown at the wheel or under

Foam specks on the lens
where it met
my teeth
If speech embargoed emits
tines or spikes
might tumbled sand anaesthetics
supply torsioned skin as parchment.

In my dreams soldiers shadows steel-browed and tensile
summon aircraft screeching phallic and armed.
Set us to flight or walk or crawl
or pulling one fist of earth over the other against that insistent friction

You
have dreamed it too:
cement walled crawl spaces
transparent tenements for
the likes
of us.

Who could have less to hide–

but drift
across storefronts
under street lamps
crowd into shopping malls
shipyards
senate chambers

–in hairshirts
of many colors
Cache of zinc
and lead
tungsten flame
charm
of mercury vapor
let us
let our wolf note
exhale
half-buried
half-ascent
its troubled
wave battered
breath
now swept low–

Shall I

swear or forewarn
as thought races its
final lap
My legs numb
still lurching seaward.

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writer's book

this is the first page of a book that I am trying to dedicate to different forms of writing. that might not be apparent on first glance. it is completely abstract: mainly line, some color, no traces of letters but I started it out in pencil, following the contours of the very rough, handmade paper. this is not the first I have done this sort of drawing but it is the first time that I deliberately associated it with writing while making it. whether that makes it writing is not necessarily for me to say, but I was trying simply to write when I laid it out. other pages might come to contain that which is more recognizable as English or they might not; my only plan is to write, in one way or another, on each page subsequent to this one.

that is all I am going to say for now, except that you can click on the image to display a larger version. we’ll see how the rest turn out if I can ever learn to do this sort of thing more quickly than one piece every two months.
Continue reading

speechlessly the idiot faced the crowd

Tonight I felt like saying things in a slightly different way, but it turns out that I have paying work to do and so all I have to offer is this unfinished image. I realize it does not really have what one would call a central focus, which is not necessarily a fault, but I have not yet decided whether I need one or not:

Wildlife (in progress)

Wildlife (in progress)

The original is 6000 pixels wide onscreen, so I thought I’d be nice and not try to overwhelm your monitor with the whole thing, but below is a detail at full size. I will probably work a little to soften some of the edges. Otherwise, I have a few things in mind that I still want to add to break up the monotony a little but it is always fun editing large images on a 15″ laptop. Yes I would love a bigger monitor. Stay tuned for the tip jar! Here is the closeup:

Wildlife detail

Wildlife detail

You can see a larger version here, but this still is quite a bit smaller than the original. I sometimes wish that I could line my walls with glowing lcd screens because I have always found their luminosity especially fascinating in a way that old CRT screens just never did it for me, you know?

The working title is “wildlife.” Beyond this I cannot tell you any more about what it will look like when “finished” because I myself do not know. I work intuitively most of the time and rarely plan out work like this in advance. In fact, when I do plan them out in advance is usually when I get the poorest results, so whether or not there is method to my madness, there is at least sometimes a sense of direction and that uncanny feeling you get when you know it is time to stop. I have not reached that point with this piece yet.

***

Just to keep the political fires fanned, here are a few links for you:

LJ user sparkymonster on racism in the queer community

Obama’s mandate is not to keep America treading the center-right path

Maya Angelou answers the question, “Is there a tiny little part of you that says ‘Did this really happen?'”